The day my heart broke a little ...

...and grew a lot.

This big boy here had trouble deciding what to eat for breakfast this morning. He ran back and jumped on his bed. I asked if he was excited about the day ahead or nervous. He answered, "A little nervous, a little excited". I assured him that I felt the same way. Then, "Will you cry Mummy?". "I'll try my best not to," I replied, too scared to commit to something I doubted I could fulfill. I added that if I did, it would only be because I'm so proud of him. I asked if he thought he would cry and he told me softly, "I'm not sure".  I wrapped my arms around him, my head resting on his shoulder, so that he couldn't see the tears punching at my eyelids. I must have disguised my pain well enough for a breakfast choice to be made.

His appetite was small, mine non-existent.

All the while I was worrying, "Is he prepared well enough?", "What pitfalls lay before him?", "How can I be doing this to him?". And then I forced a deep breath and chanted, "It'll all be okay", over and over again as I fed children, brushed teeth and hair, double-checked his enormous backpack, until I almost half-believed it.

We arrived in perfect time and climbed the stairs to his first classroom. You may know the familiar and stomach-churning sensation of farewelling a loved one at the airport.  That's what it was like.

My big boy clutched my hand, in silence, as we found the place to put his bag and chose an activity. I pointed out the children he already knew and he began to relax, a little.  I think this photo really sums it up though. I suspect my face looked the same.  Brows slightly furrowed, stiff smile, tense knuckles.

I kissed him, "on the forehead Mummy". And bravely left him in the, I'm sure, very capable care of his new teacher.  Shoulders back, head held high I walked out and left him there...  I am not really sure how I did.

 I could easily have been sick.

I managed to make it to the very thoughtfully organised, Tea & Sympathy morning, in the park, across the road and every now and then wondered how my beautiful son was coping.  In my heart of hearts I knew he would be fine. 

This is really just about me not coping well.  He's been my constant buddy for 5 years now, you know? 

I passed my time with the dreaded ironing pile while Woo slept and was thrilled to see the long hand tick closer and closer to 12.30 pm before happily putting the baby in the car and driving back to collect him.

Now the feeling in my tummy is of joy flipping in excited anticipation.  You know, the one of waiting in the arrival hall for a loved one who you've been separated from for too long?

  And there is my handsome, clever, brave and well prepared big boy.  Backpack swinging, smiley face, happy to kiss me on the lips this time.  Ah, the relief!  I think I inhaled properly for the first time all day. 

We did it.  My boy and me.  We both managed, him admirably, and I'm sure tomorrow will be easier for everyone.

By the way did you know "Spot goes to school.  I go to school"?  Or so his little ticked worksheet tells me! 

E x - exhausted and overwhelmed.

pi'lo

One of my absolutely fave blogs is pi'lo by Canadian, Heather Shaw.

vintage grosgrain ribbon

She has the most extraordinarily simple and beautiful style and creates glorious homewares, children's treasures and 'things' from mostly creamy white linen and felt and other vintage materials.

felt loot pail

 There is something so serene and inviting about Heather's blog, house and homewares.  No wild colour clashes here, which is something I've been trying to harness myself. 

vintage napkins

I would say my natural inclination is to stay with a 'clean' palette although some of the fabrics I fall for just send it all awry.  Although I know this is perfectly acceptable and that I can have whatever colours I like it does upset my preferred style.  Funny though that I like to wear brigher colours than I would ever have in my house! 

pleated scarves

My aim this year is to whittle the stash down to a more calm colour wheel.

Poppytalk is hosting an annual contest to find the best of design and pi'lo has been nominated for the 'favourite handmade housewares'.  I placed a vote for Heather today and if you'd like to help her out please pop over here and click on pi'lo.  Easy!  I'm sure she'd be pleased!

all images from pi'lo

happy australia day

My Goofy Australian Kids - please excuse the terrible photo I'm afraid my little camera is ill.

I celebrated our beautiful country and our great state Victoria, the Garden State, with a long walk with friends and Tiggy.  Near Av's house there are a number of linked parks, walkways and thoroughfares that  weave through the gracious houses of Glen Iris. The three boys had fun on their scooters and each other and Av and I were able to chat, almost uninterupted for an hour and a half. What joy!

Lunch with Flossy a very casual affair, fun!

Family dinner with the most delicious fish tacos. They were scrumptious and I highly recommend them. All four of us enjoyed them, well at least some portion anyway. Woo ate a tortilla, Tiggy a tortilla with fish and sour cream and Greg and I stacked it all on and gobbled it all up! YUM.

this little star made me smile

Now, where did I hide that apple and blueberry crumble?

Mmmm!  That was good.

E x

dear God

We've had unseasonably wet and cold weather today. Last week we reached 43C and today we got to 19C. There's snow on the hills! It's summer down here!!!

I sat eating my breakfast thrilled to see the pouring rain beating our windows, leaves swirling and trees buffetted. Hoping it was reaching our reservoirs. As Tiggy sat in front of the window I overheard him softly praying to God for the sun would come out. At that very moment one little boy's prayer was answered and the house became filled with the glow of sunshine funnelled down between the heavy grey blanket that surrounded our little house. He looked up at me beaming and said gently in complete belief, "God heard me Mummy". Breakfast unfinished, I dashed outside in the then, thankfully, easing rain, clambered inelegantly onto the table, dressing gown flapping in the gale, the hems of my pj's soaked and shot this pic whilst balancing precariously - quite a feat for Miss Clumsy! Tigs danced at my feet, excited to be outside in his 'jammies and Uggs, in the rain, to have his answer to prayer documented.

rock star

My beautiful boy and his big boy haircut. 

His long locks were left on the salon floor - sniff. 

Tiggy is frequently referred to as a 'she' and although he never minds, I finally braced myself, took him to The Barber Club, and asked for his hair to be more boyish.  So I went in with my pretty boy and left with the ROCK-STAR. 

He's so pleased that he has 'product' now.  And whenever his haircut is mentioned, nonchalantly sweeps his fringe across his forehead.  It's very cute. 

Thanks Mel, for the groovy new do!

happy birthday Momo

Last weekend (I know I said it again!) we celebrated Momo's birthday with a yummy meal from our new super cool, compact and brilliant barbeque. 

Hope you had a lovely day Momo. We love you.
x

number two ...

Oh these were yummy. Little choc chip cookies. I didn't quite have enough chocolate so I added a good couple of handfuls of super special Mildura grown sultanas. A great way to reduce the calories and to increase the flavour. Small confession here - on Thursday night I ate 6 for supper and a cup of tea. Don't tell the children.

Number 2 stole the cookies from the cookie jar!

She stalked me as I took these pics and every second one has Woo desperately trying to gain access to the tasty nibbles. Cheeky Woo Woo - we do love you.